Womanhood - A Stamp of Approval

While infertility is not a regular struggle in my life anymore, I will always have a heart for those in the midst of this struggle and a desire to help fertile people understand and love those going through the painful struggle of infertility.

It is for that reason that I am posting this great quote I recently came across:

(Regarding adopting their daughter) . . . "Yes, her arrival filled the void we felt in our family and we were so grateful for the gift of adoption, however, a successful adoption does not erase the pain of infertility. When a woman is pregnant it is like a great confirmation of her womanhood - a stamp of approval that she is worthy to create life. I still had that lingering feeling of being passed over, of somehow not being worthy of that gift (that may sound severe, but I am sure I am not alone in this feeling).

No, the woman who wrote this is certainly not alone in this feeling. I almost felt a huge sigh of relief after I first read this quote. It explained something I've never been able to put words to. From time-to-time I still get a pit-in-my-stomach feeling when I see pregnant women or hear a pregnancy announcement. And it doesn't make sense to me because I am totally fine not ever being pregnant (I am quite happy to adopt any other kids God wants to give us). But this quote explains my feelings exactly - and the feelings of several other women who can't get pregnant that I have sent it to!

I also recently read this great article for friends of family of people who are struggling with infertility.

Wounds

A new friend of mine who is battling the difficult journey of infertility recently asked me if the grief of infertility still affects my life. While it is not something I currently struggle with, the wounds of infertility never entirely go away.

But, I am grateful for that. Because many days, if not every day, I still look at Abram through the lens - created by the wounds, I am sure - of what it was like to not have a child. And it makes me so incredibly aware of what a gift he is and what a gift it is to be a full-time mom.

Lately when I see all the fun and adorable things Abram does as an 18 month old, I have been thinking about how these are things I dreamed of - and had to grieve - three and four years ago. When you are in the dark valley of infertility it isn't just a newborn baby you long for and dream of.

It is THIS:

And THIS:Watching the garbage trucks drive by 5-6 times every Monday morning.

And THIS:Driving his sippy cup in his dump truck!

And THIS:

Taking everything he can reach out of the refrigerator while I made dinner.

And then climbing all the way in the frig!

And lastly, THIS:

A sweet, sleeping baby boy.

GOD IS FAITHFUL!

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3