All is Not Lost

From: savetheorphan.blogspot.com

Have you ever come across something that so accurately expresses things you have been thinking and feeling but have never been able to put into words? Last night I had such an experience. My good friend, Janel Sullivan, sent me a blog post (savetheorphan.blogspot.com) that puts into words so much of what I have come to realize adopting orphans is going to mean for us - and them. The blog is about children and an orphanage in Sierra Leone, which is a worn-torn country similar to the country we are adopting from. I can talk about attachment issues, learning disabilities, and other adoptionese issues (which I do hope to do) that kids who are adopted from hard places will likely face. But, this is what it all boils down to . . .

Though Innocence is Taken…All is Not Lost
We call these children “orphans”…. Children who have lost parents…suffered immense loss…parentless…. To think this is the darkest part of their life ….the only piece that defines them… would be naïve and quite an understatement…

I think it is fair to say that “orphans” are plagued by not only living life “alone” but suffer through pasts many of us may not ever feel we could overcome… How about the child who is not only orphaned but also a victim of child abuse… intense physical and emotional battery… what about the orphan who not only lost their parents but actually witnessed their untimely death first hand…. The child who has vivid dreams of the moment their parent took their last breath.. what about the orphan who works for a living and at 12 years old cannot read or write a complete sentence because they have never been given the education or stimulation to overcome their learning disability….what about the orphan who was born malnourished, was abandoned by their mother and left for dead in the “starvation” unit of a third world hospital… what about the orphan who was taken from her mother because her mother sold her little body … day in and day out to hungry dirty men…all for something to eat…what about the orphan that suffered such extreme hunger they now suffer long term eating disorders…or what about the orphan who was abandoned not once, not twice….but many times… what does that feeling of worthlessness and being unwanted do to a tiny little soul?

It’s easy to look at “Saving the Orphan” (the organization whose blog this is from) and think we can just “fix it” for them.... taking them in off the streets…or by adopting them and giving them a family… that everything else they have been forced to endure will just disappear… If it were only that simple… I do believe that a child cannot truly begin to heal until they have a family support unit… someone that they know will be committed to them through their healing process and when they come through on the other side… but it really is only the first step…There is so much work for God to do in these tiny little hearts… so much restoration that needs to take place…There will be uphill battles and valleys so dark you wish you had never started the journey to “save” them in the first place… because now it hurts you to much too… I think that is us in our humanness… but if we choose to love and parent these children through Christ… instead of not wanting to take a chance on loving an orphaned child and allowing them a permanent place in our guarded hearts… we instead realize that through our suffering comes healing to another… just like through Christ’s suffering we find redemption and forgiveness…a permanent place to rest our heart… straight into his arms as he spreads them wide upon the cross…experiencing the ultimate sacrifice….his very life…

I am leading a small group of families with hearts wide open praying God will open the floodgates and provide us the approvals we need to bring home 21 children and make them our own… that they will no longer be called orphans but our children… I am not naïve in realizing many of the children we have found families for have experienced the “lives” I shared with you above…. They are not only orphans but broken children with broken hearts and broken pasts… and although there are moments when they are hard to love…. I will not be scared away… I will not run when it hurts me to love them… I will not leave when the going gets tough… Why? Well because I know I am hard to love… I am also a broken person with a past God has also redeemed…. And he didn’t give up on me…. In fact he chased me… and he chases you… and he will chase us down and love us till we can no longer deny his presence in our lives…. I want to show that same “love” to my soon to be children… and thought the roads will be long and winding… we will reach that destination where true restoration will occur and they will find their healing… after all… although their innocence may have been taken… all is not lost. That is a promise we CAN hold onto.