Some Follow-up Items

Here are some random topics I'm feeling the need to provide some follow-up on.

Follow-up Item No.1 Our African kids' birthdays. I posted them awhile go (primarily for some families members who asked) and Jason informed me I posted them incorrectly. Oops! Claire: July 25 (turning 11), Zoe: August 19 (turning 9), Isaiah: October 12 (turning 4)

Follow-up Item No. 2 Zoe's card to Jason for his birthday. I had said I couldn't wait to post what Zoe wrote on Jason's birthday card. However, after Jason read it, he preferred for me to not post it because it was so incredible - almost a sacred glimpse into her soul.

Follow-up Item No 3 A very good comment regarding a statement I made in my blog post yesterday. 
My statement was, "while adopting older and/or special needs children is extremely difficult, it is also extremely DOABLE." Here is the comment my friend Sandra made (and I am very thankful she brought up these important thoughts!): 

Thanks so much for this article and your individual thoughts. I see your point and respect where it is coming from, but I disagree that it is extremely doable for everyone - especially for families who need two incomes or families where the Mom's job provides the insurance, etc. 

Mom's need to know upfront that they will need to be at home providing safe boundaries for a long time (years!) 

In the China program, we've seen alot of older kid/SN adoptions disrupted because the parents were simply not able to... or willing to... or maybe did not have the skill to... 

I think alot of parents thought, "OK! Our kid is in 3rd grade so we'll just put them in school." But you know it simply is not like that for kids from hard places. 

If anyone is thinking of adopting an older child or a child with special needs, I highly recommend ALOT of reading and meeting other adoptive parents (like you!) who have walked that beautiful journey. 


I am SO THANKFUL for Sandra's wise input. When I went back just now and read my own words "extremely DOABLE," I'm wondering what I was smoking yesterday?!? Sheesh! Yes, it is "doable" to adopt older kids and parent them to healing, but it does come at a high price (staying home all the time, not seeing friends much, no other commitments, I could probably go on and on). And it is definitely not for everyone.

I think my heart in saying what I said is that I don't want people to so easily say, "adopting older children isn't for me because it is too hard" or because "I'm scared of the issues the kids will have." I loved the article that I mentioned because it encouraged people to consider adopting older children. I think what I should have said (instead of "extremely DOABLE" - yikes!) is that adopting older kids will be more than you can handle. But, that "more than you can handle" is DOABLE through JESUS. There. That is what I meant to say!